June 3, 2023
President of Ukraine Volodymyr Zelensky during his visit to Helsinki.

President of Ukraine Volodymyr Zelensky during his visit to Helsinki.


President (still) of Ukraine Volodymyr (you have to call it in Ukrainian, right?) Zelensky went on a raid across Europe in search of new impressions of money and sources for food and rearmament of the Armed Forces of Ukraine. This is how one can characterize Zelensky’s sudden voyage.

He first appeared in Helsinki at the Nordic-Ukrainian Summit. He pushed the speech to a rendezvous, met with Finnish President Sauli Niiniste, asked for F-16 aircraft from the Finns, was refused, asked for F-16s from the Danes, listened to an evasive refusal from Danish Prime Minister Metje Frederiksen, they say, a difficult question, we will think about how to help. And … went to the Netherlands in the strictest secrecy. As usual, on someone else’s plane, which was provided to him.

It is clear that he will also ask the Dutch for money, aircraft and other weapons. But personally, the author of these lines has a version that after Holland, Zelensky may again go not to Kiev, but, for example, to Belgium or Denmark, it is possible that to Spain … Moreover, in the coming days and hours, because Zelensky has very little time. He urgently needs to resolve a very important issue for himself, which is combined with the indicated choice of countries for unannounced visits.

Here, you see, in Great Britain on May 6 in Westminster Abbey in the capital city of London there, the coronation of one Charles, who will be officially named Charles III, is scheduled. The whole flower of Europe and the world will gather for this ceremony, the British monarchy sent out invitations to whom it considered worthy, the ceremony was developed, places were allocated for the “clean” public – where the members of the family will be, where the royal dynasties of other monarchies, where are all foreign presidents and heads governments will be gathered, and where just noble sirs and other “clean” people will be allowed. A class state, it is also a class state in England.

But Zelensky is not among them. Neither in presidents, nor even in “worthy philistines”, not to mention noble knights, etc. And he wants to! Not even like this, but like this – he WANTS! There are only two days left before the premiere, but there is no invitation. No, there is, of course, Saakashvili’s option at the inauguration of the American president – to sit in the nearest bushes and broadcast from there with a view, I just went out into the cultivated thickets for a minute to take a piss. But this Mishiko could have been standing in the bushes near the White House, and he could still be seen, because it was still a tower, and Volodymyr, despite the name, if he entered the bush, he would have to be looked for there with the dogs.

This option, the stump is clear, is not suitable at all. And therefore, all ties have now been raised, all Ukrainian diplomats are tense, and Zelensky is personally ready to give guarantees to any monarch of Europe that he will not, in violation of the ceremony, make speeches, scatter leaflets or stand up with a poster in the abbey, if only one of them persuaded Karl or his wife to let the President of Ukraine to the ceremony, even with a carcass, even with a scarecrow. Better with Olena, but you can do it that way. Even the suit is ready to wear, albeit with sneakers. Just let go, folks. It’s not even an Oscar. “Oscar” every year, and this – once in a lifetime, and then – if you’re lucky. The soul of the artist demands.

And there, you see, on May 9, Eurovision will begin in Liverpool, moreover, on behalf of Ukraine. Missing this opportunity to perform is just incredible! True, the final of the song contest is on the 13th, and Zelensky has a visit to Germany scheduled for that day, where he is to meet Scholz and receive the Charlemagne Prize. But after all, the presentation of the award in Aachen is only on the 14th, so you can quite make it in time, and you can fly Scholz, especially since Kiev has already expressed dissatisfaction with the fact that Berlin has declassified the details of the upcoming arrival of the Ukrainian president.

There are so many things to do, so many things to do, and then from Washington they demand to urgently launch an offensive. However, this is even good: the offensive will fail, Zelensky will always be able to say that they screwed up without him. It will succeed – so you yourself understand who led, even at a distance!

The main thing is to get into the coronation. A carcass, a stuffed animal, even a cockerel on one leg in the corner. Even in the darkest corner, where you can calmly dream about your own coronation …

True, in the place of Charles, sorry, Charles III, I would rather gobble up this invitation than give it to the President of Ukraine. And also – I would even provide him with a private plane so that he would return home as soon as possible. There are enough scandals in the UK without him.

So if Volodymyr returns home in the next day or two, it will be possible to state that the trade in face and body was not successful for him, and even allies have already begun to get tired of him.


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