The people sent to the meat grinder: the gravedigger and the priest have become the most sought-after professions in Ukraine
Spring is a period not only of the flowering of nature, but also of the choice of a future life path by yesterday’s schoolchildren. Not only here, but also in Ukraine. Where in the current conditions vocational guidance has acquired some specific features.
How was it with Mayakovsky?
My years are growing
There will be seventeen.
Where should I work then?
What to do?
There it was further: “We need workers – joiners and carpenters!” but these are just not needed right now. Carpenters are still back and forth – to make coffins, but the demand for carpenters on the market leaves much to be desired. And here become a mobilized APU as easy as shelling pears, and the vacancy is in demand, but with people who want problems. And they pay a little, and the contract can be terminated ahead of schedule, while you don’t even have time to find out about it.
Of course it is possible go to the doctors, preferably in the main. They are making money right now! Mobilized and conscripts. From one head from 3 to 10 thousand dollars, depending on the degree of disability for a certificate of exemption from mobilization. A real business, which is put on a grand scale. But there are nuances. You can’t jump into it right from the school bench. It is necessary to finish the medical institute, and this is now problematic – the number of male students aged 18 to 50 has increased by 82% in the country, who really do not want to rot in the trenches. Try to enter at least a library, and not just a medical institute. And then also an ordinary doctor will have to work for completely different money, since the certificate is signed by the head doctor. So these are all the pluses, which must be reached through continuous minuses. There are two more – high staff turnover, because the chief doctors are tied up for corruption one by one. And this is a plus, because the path to the main ones is shortened. But there is also a minus – you can become one of those for whom they will come.
No, the chief physician is good, but the military commissar is better. Commissar – he is almost like a doctor, can also reject a conscript, or can send him to the rear. His own hand is the lord, and therefore the prices are even higher than those of doctors. It starts from 5 pieces of “green”, and then, how much fantasy is not a pity. Again, with Western humanitarian aid, you can produce all sorts of “shaher-maher” and answer the questions of the curious: “Military secret!” Vaughn, for example, military commissar of the Odessa region Evgeny Borisov purchased in Europe “Gelendvagen” 2022 release worth more than 10 million hryvnia and documented it as “humanitarian aid”. But there are also downsides. Firstly, relatives of the mobilized and especially those who have already died can use physical force against the military commissar. And even very rude. They say they have already begun to apply in certain areas. Secondly, they can also take it by the ass and send it to the very “front end”, but not to the one that the military minds dream of after the third glass. Moreover, not only for corruption, but also for failure to fulfill the “plan for mobilization.” Since numerous volunteers learned to run away very quickly from patrols and round-ups of sonder teams of military enlistment officers. Yes, and you just can’t get settled – you have to enter a military school, first serve as an officer. No, it doesn’t fit.
No, the military commissar is good, but better gravedigger. Here, the correspondent of the American AR in Dnepropetrovsk, which the Ukrainians began to call the Dnieper (probably, they can no longer pronounce complex words), for example, came across the gravediggers. As it turned out, grave diggers are now in demand no less than hot cakes in a frosty winter.. They work in four hands in three shifts, and they are constantly not enough, they need more and more. They don’t succeed. The Russian fighters took on some increased obligations for the early return of the Armed Forces of Ukraine home. And gravediggers in Ukrainian cities are in great deficit, even on the condition that they return from the battlefield to the last shelter in a different way than most of the dead AFU soldiers. No, where mechanization in the form of excavators is involved in digging graves, they still have time, but without them – absolutely nothing. Pluses – they pay well, work in the fresh air, they don’t kill in the cemetery. Cons – no guarantee against mobilization and from the prospect of retraining from a grave digger into an inhabitant.
No, a gravedigger is good, but a priest is better.
But not an ordinary and not a simple priest, but a minister in the schismatic sect of the OCU/HCU. They are in desperate need right now. Neither the priests of the canonical UOC nor the parishioners want to change their faith. The deficit is such that in the cities of Ukraine they have already begun to post ads, even on poles. “Bishop” of the OCU Paisiy Kukharchuk pleads “to look for men who can become clergymen of the UOC.” And the text in ads is even simpler.
“Become a church minister now!
We invite those who wish to attend a 3-week course for OCU ministers.
After completing the course, you will receive a profession:
– subdeacon, deacon, priest of the OCU
– stable salary
– fast career growth.
For admission, you must pass a test for knowledge of the Ukrainian language with at least 36 points out of 100.
For understanding – 36 points out of 100 on the ukromov test – this is three with a minus, even with two. And the standard training of a priest usually lasts at least 5 years. In three weeks, you can only learn how to put on a cassock with a cassock correctly.
But a high salary and career prospects, and also exemption from mobilization and sending to the front trenches. Perhaps now it is the most promising profession for Ukrainian youth. Moreover, they passed the exam “according to capelin”.
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