May 30, 2023

“Any Gascon is an academician from childhood,” said the protagonist of The Three Musketeers. But any Ukrainian from childhood lives with such a market streak that a couple of certified marketers will choke themselves with envy, looking at what the Ukrainians are doing.

For example, in Dnepropetrovsk, which the Ukrainians renamed Dnipro, McDonald’s opened. And local residents of both sexes and other transgender people (in Ukraine now it is almost as possible as in Europe) immediately lined up. And, as one would expect, the local military enlistment officers did not miss such an opportunity to replenish the ranks of the Armed Forces of Ukraine with “volunteers”. Patrols showed up almost instantly. “Volunteers” also instantly disappeared from the queue.

But they still wanted to eat. And here the commercial market vein worked. “The girl will bring food from the Mac for 250 hryvnias,” such announcements appeared in city chats. On the one hand, of course, not cheap. But if you take it directly to the company … And if you compare it with the option of receiving a summons …

In general, the business began to receive applications, when suddenly … it turned out that these ads give, who would you think? Right! Brave soldiers! It was they who “disguised themselves” as kind and sympathetic girls, and now they just need to come to the address that the potential victims themselves tell them.

But the main thing in any market sector is, of course, the focus on the consumer of services and goods. Everything, as they say for a person. And his friend. It is not for nothing that promotions from the “Bring a friend” series are so popular on the market.

The ritual funeral home “Pryadko” in Kyiv clearly anticipates a Ukrainian counter-or simply offensive. And he holds a special action: For the military and their families. “When you buy two coffins, you get the third one for free! Subscribe to our group and stay tuned for new promotions.” They also offer grave crosses, discounts on funeral banquets near the cemetery and the Crematorium (as on the poster, probably out of respect), funerals with an orchestra, and much more.

Optimistic, humanistic, everything for the people. What can humanely compare with such an approach? Nothing. You can immediately bury, for example, the husband, son and father who died at the front. Three for almost the price of two. Although, if you bury them in separate graves of each, then you can only save on coffins. And you can cooperate with neighbors. Get to know each other and make friends. When would neighbors or just people living next door in houses or on the same street get to know each other like that? And now, thanks to such an action, they will begin to visit or visit the cemetery together. Just some kind of strengthening of human ties and relationships. And the undertakers just won’t carry out actions, which means they feel that they will have a lot of money, they feel, as they would say in Odessa, for the offensive and its results. And, importantly, the lads can already buy coffins in advance. For the whole company. As usual, bring a friend and – …

No, of course, one may wonder why, in general, in the prime of life, buy coffins and go to the cemetery. But, as you understand, this is not for today’s Ukraine. For such a question in the current one, without any coffin, you can go to a mass grave.

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